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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24150526">A-Z of Malec</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/YassBanrion/pseuds/YassBanrion'>YassBanrion</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alec Lightwood Deserves Nice Things, Bottom Alec Lightwood, Cuddly Alec Lightwood, Domestic Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Fighting Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Happy Alec Lightwood, Happy Magnus Bane, Hurt Alec Lightwood, Insecure Magnus Bane, Protective Magnus Bane, Sad Alec Lightwood, Suicidal Alec Lightwood, Top Magnus Bane, but they make up, first time alec</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 19:22:24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>12,770</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24150526</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/YassBanrion/pseuds/YassBanrion</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A bunch of one shots for each letter of the alphabet! Will include fluff, angst, probably some smut and who knows what else!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>37</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>316</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Arguing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hi everyone, I hope everyone is feeling ok at the moment! It’s a weird and scary time! I’ve been very lax with my writing and I’m trying this to sort of kick myself back into action!</p><p>I would love if anyone has any suggestion words for the alphabet! I so far have A and I haven’t even decided B yet haha but I am determined to get to Z! A little project to keep me sane for the next few months until my job reopens!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Arguing was not something Magnus enjoyed. He and Alec had done a lot of it in their early relationship. They had argued over secrets, over Magnus’ past, over the future.</p>
<p>They still argued now of course, but they rarely fought like this. With this much intensity. Even when they had broken up Magnus had felt sad, and betrayed, but not angry, not like this. </p>
<p>“How could you do this to me”, Magnus growled at his boyfriend. He knew he was being irrational, knew he was angry at Alec for something he would likely do himself.</p>
<p>Alec had come home from patrol, with ripped gear and a healing wound on his shoulder that was clearly serious. When Magnus had asked him what happened he had admitted he had pushed Jace out of the way of a seelie spear. </p>
<p>Magnus knew deep down that the action was done unconsciously. Jace would have done the same for Alec a thousand times over.  They were parabatai, they were brothers. </p>
<p>But Magnus had immediately felt rage. Rage for the fact that he almost lost Alec. Rage and the crushing suffocation of fear whenever he thought about Alec dying. The old memories of past loved ones leaving flaring up until it consumed him.</p>
<p>So here he was, glaring at Alec, he wanted to scream at him, wanted him to understand how much he was hurting, how frightened he was. His heart was slamming against the inside of his chest, he was almost delirious with rage. </p>
<p>He slammed his fist down on the desk, anything to push the anger out. As his hand connected to the wood sparks flew, he was losing control. </p>
<p>“You have absolutely no idea how afraid I am of losing you, you die Alec, and I die” he practically yelled. </p>
<p>He stepped towards Alec, and his boyfriend flinched.</p>
<p>It was momentary, it was minute, but it happened. Magnus stopped dead. Horror filling him. He had scared Alec, the one thing he had always fought so hard to avoid. </p>
<p>He would never hurt Alec, never allow his temper to get the better of him like that. He knew it would be the end. Alec would never look at him the same. He would never forgive himself. </p>
<p>He stared at his boyfriend, waiting for the fight or flight response to kick in.</p>
<p>But he didn’t move, Alec was just staring at him. Covered in dirt and his own blood. His blue eyes, wide in his face, were beginning to fill with tears. His lip trembled almost undetectably, “That’s not fair” he whispered, “you know that this is my life, I don’t want to leave you, but someday I will”. </p>
<p>The realisation came down on Magnus, Alec hadn’t flinched because he was afraid, he had flinched because Magnus’ words had hurt him. </p>
<p>Magnus felt the fight go out of him, overwhelmed by sadness, and the all too familiar feeling of impending loss. </p>
<p>“I just don’t know if I will survive losing you Alexander”</p>
<p>There it was. The truth Magnus had avoided speaking. It wasn’t fair to Alec, it was a problem he couldn’t solve.  </p>
<p>Alec opened his mouth again, and Magnus had no idea what was coming. But he stopped and closed his mouth. </p>
<p>He looked so young to Magnus in that moment.</p>
<p>Too young to have such a suffocating weight on his shoulders. He shouldn’t be risking his life everyday. The unfairness swelled in Magnus body like a wave of dizziness.</p>
<p>This was Alec’s life, nothing could change that. Magnus had bared his feelings to him, and he honestly didn’t know how he was going to react.</p>
<p>Magnus braced himself for Alec to walk out the door. He had every right, Magnus had jumped down his throat the second he’d walked in. </p>
<p>But he didn’t. </p>
<p>He moved towards Magnus with shadowhunter speed. He was across the room in the blink of an eye and in Magnus’ arms before he even realised what was happening.</p>
<p>“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry” he sobbed into Magnus’ neck, a mantra repeated over and over. </p>
<p>Magnus held him and said the same words back. </p>
<p>Magnus could smell Alec’s blood where it was drying on his clothes. But under it he could smell Alec, his Alec, sweat and his, now their, sandalwood cologne. </p>
<p>He could feel him under his hands as he moved them up and down. He could feel the muscles in his back, so familiar now to Magnus. </p>
<p>He could feel Alec’s heart beating. The feel of his breath on Magnus’ neck. The wetness of his tears soaking into his shirt. </p>
<p>He tried to calm his beating heart. He tried to push down the thought of what losing Alec would feel like when almost losing him hurt so badly. </p>
<p>They stayed like that for a long time, and Magnus’ heart started to beat a little slower. He reminded himself that Alec was here, solid, and alive in his arms. </p>
<p>They had survived another day.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Comments, criticisms and prompts welcome ❤️</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Breathing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Ok this one is very angsty and I’m sorry, it was in my drafts and I kept going back to it so I decided to just post it! It has suicidal thoughts, and a lot of pain for Alec mentally so if that is a trigger for anyone please be safe while reading!</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Alec knows Magnus loves him.</p><p>He knows this with every fibre of his being. He’s never been so sure of anything in his life, and Magnus tells him everyday, with words and with actions.</p><p>Alec knows Magnus loves him. </p><p>But it doesn’t stop the nights where his thoughts run away from him. When his brain won’t shut up at 2am, and tells him that Magnus doesn’t love him.</p><p>Tells him that nobody could really love him.</p><p>When this happens he usually curls closer to Magnus, allows the warmth of his body and the smell of his skin sooth him.</p><p>It’s been happening every night for 2 weeks, bleeding into the days too. He kept telling himself the next day would be better, that he didn’t need to tell Magnus.</p><p> </p><p>But it’s not better, the weight of everything seems more overwhelming than it ever has, like every bad moment of his life is suddenly on top of him. </p><p>Magnus is not here, he’s at a conference for warlocks in Geneva .</p><p>See. The voice tells him. He’s not here because he needed to get away from you. You’re too much, too over bearing, you take up all his time.</p><p>Alec knows it isn’t true, but his beating heart, like thunder in his own ears, is over powering the rational side of his brain.</p><p>It reminds him that everyone around him simply tolerates his presence. That it would be better if he was gone.</p><p>They wouldn’t need to worry about him. Magnus could find someone better, someone who was less of a mess. Someone who wouldn’t cry because his father forgot his birthday.</p><p>He could find someone stronger.</p><p>You’re holding him back the voice said. </p><p>Alec wasn’t sure when he had walked out to the balcony but he was suddenly aware of how cold he was. It was snowing, and he was in sweats and bare feet, his breathe surrounded him like smoke.</p><p>He peered over the edge of the balcony at the street below. Cars flew along the roads, as they always do, regardless of the time. But the sound was muffled by the snow, he felt almost like he was in a bubble.</p><p>He imagined what it would be like to simply step off. Would it hurt, would he know he was dead or would he simply cease to exist.</p><p>He didn’t want to die. Not really, even through the pain he knew that. But he didn’t really deserve to live when he was such a burden, such a disappointment. </p><p>It would be so much better for everyone.</p><p>He didn’t know how long he stood staring down, but something suddenly pulled him from his thoughts. A ringing, his phone was ringing.</p><p>He moved to get it, he felt like he was trudging through molasses, his cold limbs uncooperative. </p><p>The ringing stopped but he picked it up anyway. It was Magnus. </p><p>Call him back a small part of his mind pipped in. </p><p>Do not call him back, if he really wanted to speak to you he would have phoned again the voice told him.</p><p>He was shaking now, cold or shock he didn’t really know. But he could feel it through his body like a electric current, low level, making his entire body tremble.</p><p>He almost dropped the phone when it rang again. </p><p>This time he answered, but he couldn’t speak, could only stand in holding it. Listening to the distant sound of Magnus calling his name. He wanted desperately to speak to him but he couldn’t move.</p><p>He wanted to scream and shout at Magnus to help him, but his body no longer belonged to him, the voice had taken control.</p><p>Nobody loves you. You are worthless, pathetic, ugly, stupid, the voice screamed at him.</p><p>He dropped the phone and put his hands up to his ears, he couldn’t bear it, everything was so loud. He closed his eyes, praying the darkness would soothe him, but his heart was still trying to claw its way out of his chest.</p><p>Suddenly there was someone grabbing him. </p><p>He could hear someone calling his name and when he wrenched his eyes open he saw Magnus.</p><p>He couldn’t say anything, he couldn’t breathe, he thought maybe he was crying but everything seemed like a distant blur.</p><p>Suddenly they were on the floor, he was lying in Magnus’ arms and everything came back into vivid focus.</p><p>“Alec, breathe, breathe, breathe” Magnus was rubbing his back, taking deep breathes with every breathe Alec took. </p><p>Alec had no idea how long they stayed like that, minutes or hours, but Magnus held him as if he would never let him go.</p><p>Alec felt better and worse all at the same time. He had proven his own point, Magnus had to come back to take care of him. Now he knew even more clearly what a mess Alec was and he prepared himself for the blow of Magnus deciding it was simply too much.</p><p>But the rational part of his brain was getting its voice back, it reminded him that Magnus loves him. He was here because he loves him.</p><p>So Alec kept breathing. Knowing tomorrow would be the hardest day of all. Knowing that deep down the urge to jump off that ledge was not a one time thing.</p><p>He wanted to give up as much as he wanted to live. The two sides of him warring with each other for dominance.</p><p>He gripped onto Magnus and silently begged him not to leave him. </p><p>He wanted to say something, anything, but he couldn’t. </p><p>Instead he did as his boyfriend was telling him to do, he just kept breathing.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you for reading as always, I promise I will try do something happier for c!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Cuddling</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>This one is much more fluffy 🤍</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Magnus shifted to reach over and turn off the tv, trying not to jostle the cuddly shadowhunter who was currently lying on top of him.</p><p>When he turned it off the silence was extremely peaceful.</p><p>He breathed in softly the scent of Alec’s hair, sandalwood, of course, but also the smell that was just Alec. The smell he left on their pillows,  and the one Magnus picked up when he wore an old sweater of Alec’s around the house.</p><p>He breathed in that smell and ran his hand down Alec’s arm, the one who’s hand was gripping loosely on to his shirt. </p><p>After a particularly hard day Alec would come home exhausted or upset or just plain fed up. He would shower and eat and promptly crawl into Magnus’ arms, where he would stay until necessity called for him to move. </p><p>He needed physical intimacy when he felt bad, and Magnus would never deny him.</p><p>Magnus knew Alec used to feel bad about being needy, would be embarrassed, but he had abandoned those worries with time. He knew Magnus would always be there to hold him when he needed.</p><p>So here they were. Magnus was leaning back on the high arm of the couch, with his boyfriend asleep on his chest. He wrapped his leg around Alec’s and ran a hand through his unruly black hair.</p><p>He was snuffling slightly, not fully snoring, so Magnus knew he wasn’t fully asleep, just dozing. He knew now was the time to wake him and go to bed, it was late and the moon was high in the sky. </p><p>But he didn’t want to move, he felt content in a way that almost made him want to cry, the emotions bubbling beneath the surface. He didn’t want to break the spell surrounding them.</p><p>So he turned off the lights and summoned a blanket with a flick of his wrist. </p><p>As the loft plunged into darkness the moonlight lit them up, casting a silvery glow over the room. Magnus felt a different kind of magic, an entirely mundane one, love.</p><p>God he was so in love with this boy. </p><p>He wanted to cry, wanted to laugh, he wasn’t really sure, but looking down and knowing that Alec felt safest in his arms, meant everything to him.</p><p>So he would cuddle his shadowhunter all night, and every moment he could for as long as he could.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for reading 🤍</p><p>Comments, criticisms and prompts welcome ❤️</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Darling</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Alec and Magnus’ first time 🤍 sort of book universe, slight A/U because obviously with red scrolls we have seen their first time! But this is what I envisioned before that came out! It’s sweet and fluffy, with a teensy bit of angst at the start!</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Alec was nervous. He was walking to Magnus’ loft, it was after midnight and he was nervous.</p><p>He had snuck out after his siblings had gone to sleep, like he did every night now. He would stay with Magnus and then return home before they woke up.</p><p>He was ashamed of lying, and he felt immeasurably bad that Magnus was a secret. He deserved someone who would shout their relationship from the rooftops. </p><p>Alec wanted to do it, he wanted more than anything to tell people, but he was afraid. Afraid that his parents would hate him, disown him. Afraid that the clave would cast him out. </p><p>He was only 17, he had no mundane world experience, no education, he didn’t even technically have an identity. </p><p>His mind had a tendency these days to run away from him, to spiral into the deepest nightmares, even while he was awake.</p><p>But there was one thing he was sure of. Magnus. Alec was sure beyond any reasonable doubt that he was falling in love with him. </p><p>Tonight he wanted to show Magnus how much he wanted him, how much he needed him. His heart was pounding with nervous excitement.</p><p>They had done stuff, lots of stuff actually, but Alec always stopped it before they took the final sex step. It’s not that he didn’t want to, god he wanted to, but he was scared.</p><p>Scared of what it would do to him emotionally if Magnus finally gave up waiting for him to embrace their relationship. That if he gave up that final piece of himself to Magnus they would be intrinsically entwined in a way he could never recover from.</p><p>He was also scared that he’d do something wrong, embarrass himself and ruin things. He knew deep down this was ridiculous, Magnus would never judge him for something like this. He had never made him feel silly for being inexperienced. </p><p>He also had wanted time to decide exactly what he was willing to do, willing to try.</p><p>So he had lain awake at night trying to centre himself enough to imagine what he would like Magnus to do to him. He had surprised even himself when he realised he wanted to give everything to Magnus. He wanted to feel him inside him. </p><p>He blushed to himself at the thought as he let himself into Magnus’ building.</p><p>The nerves came back as he moved towards the loft, the doubts and the shame that years of conditioning would never quite allow to go away.</p><p>He imagined what it would be like when people found out, the disgust he would see on his fathers face when he realised Alec had been intimate with another man.</p><p>He blinked to banish those thoughts, he repeated a mantra to himself, that they were the ones who were wrong. There was nothing to be ashamed of.</p><p>He was about to knock when the door flew open, and he came face to face with his warlock.</p><p>“Alexander, darling, perfect timing, I just finished a rather tricky potion for a rather tricky client”. Magnus gave him a peck on the lips and grabbed his hand, pulling him into the loft. He was still talking about potions, and then making cocktails and throwing questions at Alec about his day.</p><p>He was a flurry of activity, all bright and beautiful energy, flouncing around in a purple kimono. He took Alec’s breathe away every time. </p><p>He realised after a few minutes that Alec wasn’t responding to him and swung around, drinks in hand with a concerned frown. “Are you alright darling, you’re even more silent and broody tonight?”. </p><p>Alec smiled and reached for the drink, “I’m just really happy to see you”.</p><p>Alec had long given up trying to sound smart or poetic, and had realised, ironically given his current situation, that honesty was the easiest option.</p><p>Magnus smile blinded him and they easily fell into a familiar rapport. </p><p>An hour later they were kissing on Magnus’ couch, Alec straddling Magnus lap as the warlock traced his ruins with his manicured fingers. Leaving goosebumps in his wake, and making Alec feel shivery and almost feverish with desire.</p><p>Alec had fully intended to discuss this properly, to explain his wants to Magnus, to attempt to be romantic. But true to form Alec lost all ability to be stealthy and instead he broke the kiss and leaned into Magnus neck.</p><p>He stole every bit of confidence he could and tilted his head towards Magnus’ ear, “I want you inside me”, was what came out, and he cringed internally at his own words. So much for romantic he mumbled on his own head.</p><p>He honestly felt like the least sexy person on Earth at that moment.</p><p>Magnus frozen under him, making a small noise that sounded like a very Magnus type mix of surprised and aroused.</p><p>He pushed Alec back just enough to look at him. Alec felt a full body blush beginning but he kept eye contact, he wanted Magnus to know he meant it.</p><p>“Alexander”, he breathed Alec’s name like a prayer, like he was something to be revered. “Darling, I would love that, I am honoured you would choose me, and I would make sure you enjoyed every minute. But I have to ask. Are you sure? It’s a big step and one that I don’t want you to rush into making”. </p><p>Alec nodded, his blush deepening “I want this Magnus, I’ve been thinking about it, and I want this with you”. </p><p>Magnus smiled at him, and took his face in his hands, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. He edged him back until he took the hint and stood up. Holding out his hand to Alec he led them to the bedroom. </p><p>The next couple of hours passed in a blur, Magnus had taken his time with fore play, Alec knew he was both making it special but also giving Alec chances to stop things. </p><p>But he had never wanted to stop anything less in his life.</p><p>Magnus never pushed him, never made him feel that he owed him anything, and he knew that if he told him to stop he would. He trusted him so deeply, he knew in that moment no matter what happened he would never regret Magnus being his first. </p><p>It hurt, as Magnus opened him up, he couldn’t deny that. The strangeness of having Magnus’ fingers inside him took time to get used to. But eventually that hurt turned into liquid pleasure. </p><p>Then it hurt again as Magnus entered him, the feel of him breaching Alec felt foreign and like there was no way he would ever fit. But Magnus went slow, he kissed Alec and whispered how beautiful he was, calling him darling.</p><p>Something about that word made Alec feel loved, it seemed like a word you would use for someone precious. Magnus didn’t call anyone else darling and something in Alec wanted to believe it was because he was special.</p><p>Magnus continued to touch him, distracting him from the burn of the stretch until he bottomed out. Then he stopped, waiting for Alec to grow used to the feeling. </p><p>Alec felt slightly overwhelmed, and giddy, Magnus was inside him, he had just jumped over a massive hurdle. He didn’t feel ashamed, or dirty, or any of the things the clave told him he should feel.</p><p>He felt happy, happy in a way he realised he didn’t think was possible. Sex was never his number one priority, but for Alec the thing that he knew he would miss was this intimacy. </p><p>Being this closely joined with someone he was attracted to, someone who he was almost, or entirely in love with. The kind of intimacy other people took for granted because they are never told it’s wrong. </p><p>Magnus could sense his thoughts bringing him elsewhere and pressed his forehead against Alec’s. Their breaths mingled and Alec leaned up for a kiss, which Magnus would never deny. </p><p> </p><p>When Alec nodded for him to move he began at an almost snail like pace, never moving his eyes from Alec’s. One his hands rubbing calming circles onto the thigh Alec had against his waist. </p><p>Alec slowly realised it was starting to feel amazing. The ache was still there but it was mingled with the slow pleasurable burn of Magnus moving within him. The occasional burst of stars when Magnus hit his prostate.</p><p>As Magnus picked up the pace it got really really amazing and he felt like he never ever wanted Magnus to stop fucking him as long as he lived.</p><p>As he hit his prostate over and over Alec’s eyes rolled back in his head and he thought he might expire from the feeling.</p><p>They were covered in sweat, and Magnus’ hair was stuck to his face and neck, his skin looked like molten gold in the light. Alec had never seen anything so beautiful. </p><p>When Magnus reached between them to take Alec in hand he finally closed his eyes, allowing the feelings to take over. It only took a few strokes and he was thrown over the edge. </p><p>He was too worn out to shout so he whispered Magnus’ name hoarsely into his ear as his orgasm tore through him. Gripped his hands tightly onto his shoulders, and waited for Magnus to follow him.</p><p>“Can I come like this” Magnus asked him between thrusts, his voice also barely above a whisper. “Inside you”. Alec nodded “please I want to feel you”. That was all it took and Magnus buried his head into the crook of Alec’s shoulder, moaning heavily as he came.</p><p>They stayed like that for minutes, maybe hours, Alec had lost track of time. His body hummed with energy, counteracted by his post orgasm tiredness. </p><p>Magnus slowly pulled out and lazily waved a hand to clean them off, something Alec would be eternally grateful for, because he really did not want to move. </p><p>He shifted and laid his head on Magnus’ chest, listening to the sound of his beating heart Alec felt happier than he had in his entire life.</p><p>Magnus ran a hand through his hair and pressed a gentle kiss to the top of his head. “Thank you darling, for allowing me to experience this with you”. </p><p>Alec presses a kiss onto Magnus’ chest and tried to formulate a reply, but he was so tired he could barely think let alone speak.</p><p>Magnus seemed to just know, like he seemed to just know every part of Alec. He softly chuckled and turned off the lights.</p><p>“Go to sleep darling, dream of me”.</p><p>Alec smiled softly as Magnus enclosed him in his arms and wrapped their legs together, cocooning him into their own little bubble.</p><p>The last thing he heard before sleep took him was the soft sound of Magnus humming and the sounds of Brooklyn. </p><p>Sounds that Alec would come to know very well, even if he didn’t know it yet.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Comments, criticisms and prompts welcome ❤️</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Easy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Magnus helps Alec recover from injury, pure fluff 😍</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Alec blinked his way into consciousness, the world blurring around him like he’d had too much faerie wine. As his vision cleared he could see the familiar decor of the institute infirmary. </p><p>It was day, the New York autumn sun was shining in through the windows, bathing the room in light. He winced at the light but forced himself to look around for another person, but it seemed he was alone. </p><p>He tried to sit up and his midriff screamed in protest, a sharp pain lancing through him and stealing his breath. He remembered then the demon attack, the regular patrol that had turned sour. </p><p>There had been far more than they were expecting, and they did what they could until back up had arrived. Alec been busy killing one demon when another had come up on his side and stabbed him straight through his midriff. </p><p>He remembered the blinding pain and then nothing. He started to panic now, maybe his siblings weren’t here because they didn’t make it. He ignored the horrendous pain and pushed himself into a sitting position.</p><p>Taking a moment to steal himself he attempted to clamber off the infirmary bed. His body had other ideas and the second he stood the dizziness hit him like a train, sending him tumbling to the floor. </p><p>He was vaguely aware of someone saying his name, and when he came back to himself Jace was kneeling on front of him. The relief swam over him, and he reached out a hand, which Jace easily took. </p><p>“It’s ok Alec, everyone made it back, you were the only one seriously injured. I’m sorry we left your bedside, but it’s been three days so work beckoned” he said rolling his eyes slightly. </p><p>Alec opened his mouth to ask about Magnus, he had been in the spiral labyrinth at a conference only held every hundred years. He should still be there for another two days.</p><p>Jace, clearly knowing what he was gonna say, smirking as he helped Alec up and onto the bed. “He came home immediately, he’s gone to the loft to feed chairman, he’s gonna be pissed you woke up during the hour he hasn’t been here the last few days”.</p><p>As if conjured up, the doors flew open and Magnus appeared, every inch the dramatic warlock boyfriend Alec loves.</p><p>“Darling” his eyes widened, “you’re awake, oh thank your angel”, he muttered as he half sprinted to the bed. He wrapped Alec in a gentle hug, kissing his neck, and then his temple.</p><p>Alec could feel his magic seeking out for any discomfort. Magnus couldn’t heel the wound any further, they had done everything they could it would need to heel now on its own. But he could ease Alec’s headache and aching muscles from lying for too long.</p><p>Alec clung onto him as he was about to pull away. “Can we go home” he half whispered to his boyfriend. He still technically lived at the institute, but truthfully he hadn’t felt at home anywhere but the loft in months. </p><p>He could feel Magnus’ smiling into his hair. “I’ll ask the medic darling, lay down and I’ll be back”. With a quick kiss to his lips Magnus untangled himself and went off to find whichever medic was on shift.</p><p>Jace, who Alec had entirely forgotten about, was standing smiling at him in his patented half smirk half delighted way. “Man you are absolutely besotted, I would find it hilarious if i wasn’t so delighted”.</p><p>Alec blushed, because of course he did, and returned Jace’s smile, not trusting himself to speak without actually gushing. Jace laughed and patted his shoulder, “go home and get some rest”. He punctuated his next sentence as he walked away, “Take.It.Easy.Alec”. </p><p>“I DON’T WANT TO SEE YOU FOR THE REST OF THE WEEK” he yelled from the hall as the door slammed behind him.</p><p>Magnus came back chuckling, “I think your brother is growing on me sweetheart. The medic said you can come home, but true to your brothers sentiment, you have to take it easy”.</p><p>Alec nodded, honestly he feel so rotten that he didn’t think he could do anything strenuous even if his life depended on it.</p><p> </p><p>Within fifteen minutes they were stepping into the loft, Magnus carrying the small amount of paperwork he had allowed Alec to bring and the giant bag of medication he’d been given.</p><p>When the medic said take it easy, Magnus took it to mean that Alec was not to move unless absolutely necessary. </p><p>He spent the rest of the day taking care of him, making him tea and bringing him dinner. Pressing soft kisses to his hair every time he passed him by, going in and out of his office.</p><p>He had sat with him dozing in his lap for a while, running his hands through Alec’s hair, tracing the lines of his face as he often did while Alec napped. </p><p>Magnus always got slightly more touchy after Alec has been injured, like he’s trying to spend extra time memorising every little part of him. It makes Alec feel guilty, but also extremely loved and cherished.</p><p>Alec himself craved Magnus’ touch more in times like this too, as if it was a reminder that his time was limited. He wanted every bit of affection he could get, and give, while he could. </p><p>After the sun started to dip in the sky, Alec needed to go to bed for a proper sleep. Magnus helped him to the shower and helped him out of his sweats. He was going to step away but Alec held his hand, he almost felt like he should be embarrassed,  but this was Magnus.</p><p>“I don’t know if I have the energy to stand alone, can you stay?”. Magnus didn’t even answer, he just smiled and removed his own clothes.</p><p>It was the first time they had showered together in a non sexual way. Magnus simply helped steady him while Alec washed his body and allowed the warm water to ease his muscles. Just having Magnus there made his shaky legs feel more able to hold him up.</p><p>Then Magnus had dried him and wrapped him in the fluffiest bath robe. After giving him his medication and helping him into clean sweats they curled up in bed. </p><p>Alec felt content in a way he wasn’t sure he had felt before. Taking it easy was something that had never come simply to him. Years of forcing himself to be the best, to not show weakness, had made it extremely difficult for him to relinquish control.</p><p>But here, with Magnus, he didn’t feel like a failure for needing to rest. Magnus’ appreciation for his body being in one piece, and here for him to take care of, made Alec appreciate it.</p><p>He was starting to realise that taking it easy sometimes was the key to keeping himself in one piece for longer. Letting himself recuperate would keep him strong and alive and in Magnus’ arms.</p><p>He was vaguely aware of Magnus reading to him as he zoned in and out, exhaustion and pain medication taking hold. He shifted himself as close to Magnus as he could, laying his head over his heart as he always did. </p><p>He fell asleep to Magnus tracing the runes on his arm, still reading and with the knowledge that he would be there tomorrow to keep him safe. To help him take it easy, until his body was ready to do it all again.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you for all the views 😍 comments are always welcome! Hope everyone is keeping well x</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Free Fall</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Alec allows himself a moment to fall apart after Magnus goes to Edom.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Gah this chapter gave me serious writers block, F is not my word! I’m not overly happy but I wanted to get it out there so I can continue on!</p><p>Hope everyone is well x</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Alec was in free fall.</p><p>It had been two weeks since Magnus had gone to Edom. Two weeks where his fiancé was alone, the only comfort was knowing that he was alive. Otherwise the damn rift would be open again.</p><p>Alec had kept a brave face on, hadn’t allowed himself to cry, hadn’t allowed any dark thoughts to permeate him. </p><p>But something had shifted. The most simple thing, a small remark from a fellow shadowhunter. She had kindly told him she was sorry for his loss, her own husband had died before she came to New York. </p><p>It was the first moment that Alec realised that he may never see Magnus again. He had not allowed himself this thought, not allowed the possibility but it was all of a sudden suffocating him.</p><p>He had gone for a run, and found himself in the middle of Central Park, suddenly unable to breathe. The suffocating realisation that maybe they wouldn’t be lucky, maybe he would die before Magnus could come back, had him in a vice grip.</p><p>So he had run back to the institute, and for once he didn’t care that people were staring at him. His found Jace talking to a group in the training room, all business like, and for once he didn’t even consider that people might think he was weak.</p><p>He ran straight to him, soaked through with rain, and into his brothers arms. Jace didn’t hesitate, he never would, and he held him and allowed him to sob into his shoulder.</p><p>He had no idea how long they stood there, but when he finally felt able to breathe he lifted his head and stepped back. Jace kept a hand on his arm, knowing Alec sometimes needed even the smallest touch. Just to let him know you were there, to ground him.</p><p>They were alone now, the other shadowhunters had clearly taken the hint and left them alone. He was started to feel the creep of embarrassment now the panic had worn off. </p><p>“I’m sorry” he mumbled to his brother, eyes cast down. Alec could never really get himself to believe that he deserved to have moments like these. </p><p>Jace sighed and pulled him back into another hug. </p><p>“You’re allowed to be sad Alec. I promise you, I will follow you to the ends of the Earth and beyond to get him back”. </p><p>Alec nodded against his Parabatai’s shoulder and allowed himself to surrender to the pain engulfing him for a little while longer. </p><p>He was in free fall, but he knew Jace would catch him, would be here to keep him together until they got Magnus back.</p><p>He didn’t want to believe they wouldn’t, but he allowed himself this moment to grieve for what he’d lost. </p><p>Then he would pick himself back up and he would fight for his fiancé, with everything he has, until his dying breathe.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Comments, criticisms and prompts welcome ❤️</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Gay</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Alec struggles with the meaning of the word, and the feelings it brings to him.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Happy pride month everyone! This starts off kinda angsty but I promise it has a fluffy end!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Gay.</p>
<p>Alec vividly remembered the first time he had heard that word. </p>
<p>He had been 12, and one of the older girls in the institute had left a mundane magazine in the canteen. Alec had flicked through it out of curiosity and had found an article about sexuality. </p>
<p>There was a word for boys who liked other boys, and others too. </p>
<p>He had never told anyone how he felt, he barely even knew how he felt himself. He just knew as other boys were starting to act funny around the girls, he was feeling like that around them. </p>
<p>He had nothing to anchor him though, no explanation, no way to comprehend his feelings. He didn’t know anybody who dated someone of their own gender. He had spent most of his life at the academy, and the summers he was in New York they were barely allowed leave the grounds. </p>
<p>He had never dared to use the computer in case someone would see, had never spoken to anyone. So seeing it written down, seeing that it wasn’t just him alone in the world, made him feel happy. </p>
<p>It wasn’t for a couple more years that he realised what this really meant for him. It wasn’t until he realised that he was going to be expected to date girls, to marry a girl. He couldn’t imagine himself ever doing either, and it left a pit in his stomach. </p>
<p>The word which had brought him comfort once had started to putrefy, started to haunt him. He got older and his parents bore down on him harder and harder, expecting him to be the best. So every time he would do something wrong, his brain would taunt him, remind him that he couldn’t ever be the son they wanted. </p>
<p>That word had begun to suffocate him. The mundane world grew more excepting and he saw it everywhere. He would watch boys kissing and holding hands while he sat glamoured on subway and his heart would ache. </p>
<p>The word became his constant taunting companion. Even when he admitted how he felt to Isabelle he couldn’t use the word, as if saying it out loud would make it real.</p>
<p>He was sure he would remain in this constant agony forever, until he met Magnus, and everything began to shift into place. It wasn’t easy, he pushed back hard at first but that first kiss turned everything on it’s head.</p>
<p>Alec realised, for the very first time, that he had to be himself, or he would be crumble away to nothing. The clave would have to accept him as he was, because otherwise he would have been crushed under the weight of his own pain.</p>
<p>So he had pushed himself to be brave, with Magnus holding him steady the entire time.</p>
<p>So here he sat, after five months of dating, with I love you’s already exchanged, and there was something else Alec needed to say to Magnus. </p>
<p>Cuddling further into Magnus’ arms where they sat on the rooftop, he finally felt ready. </p>
<p>“Magnus”, he half whispered, taking his boyfriends attention from the book he was reading, “I’m gay”.</p>
<p>There was a beat of silence, and then Magnus softly kissed his temple, squeezing him just a bit tighter. He didn’t have to remind Alec this was not new information, he just knew that this was an important moment. </p>
<p>“I’m so proud of you darling”, and Alec felt his heart beat just a little faster, in a way that brought a smile to his face. </p>
<p>As he turned to kiss his boyfriend he realised that he had finally taken back his word, and once again it brought him happiness.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This kinda stems from personal struggles as it’s not always easy to say the words out loud, and I felt Alec might be someone who struggles with that! ❤️❤️  Comments are always welcome x</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Honesty</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>After being linked to Kieran with the alliance rune Alec is accidentally a little too honest about his intimate life ;)</p><p>This is set in book universe, but just so I could mention Kieran, no spoilers or anything!</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Alec breathed through the sting as Clary put the alliance rune on his skin, before turning and doing the same to Kieran.</p><p>After she finished everyone was looking at them in anticipation, but Alec didn’t feel any different. He wasn’t entirely sure what he was expecting but he was fairly certain nothing meant it hadn’t worked. </p><p>Kieran looked equally confused, and was inspecting himself as if he had expected to suddenly end up covered in ruins or something. </p><p>Clary sighed, “I don’t think it worked, maybe we should try it with another combination, Magnus, Jace?”</p><p>It was Helen who piped in, “why don’t we have dinner, see if it maybe takes a while to manifest and then we can see? No point until we make sure Alec doesn’t start growing roots or something”.</p><p>Everyone laughed, but Alec double checked his feet, just to be sure. </p><p>Dinner was delicious, and everyone was joking and laughing and Alec almost forgot about the rune. It was Aline who reminded him, when she asked him a question.</p><p>“Alec how the hell did you convince Magnus to go skiiing on your holiday, we all know how he feels about the cold!”</p><p>Alec fully meant to say something along the lines that Magnus loved him, or it was his turn to pick, but instead what came out was:</p><p>“I have an excellent gag reflex”.</p><p>The silence was palpable, and Alec slapped a hand over his own mouth. </p><p>Magnus smirked and was the first to speak, “well biscuit, I think that rune works, you’ve somehow made my boyfriend even more honest”. </p><p>Suddenly everyone burst out laughing, and Clary was delighted her rune did apparently work. </p><p>Alec wanted the ground to swallow him whole. It clearly wasn’t a secret that he would be having sex with his boyfriend but he wasn’t exactly someone who enjoyed discussing his blow job skills on front of all of his friends. </p><p>But as the laughter around the table continued it became infectious, he actually felt himself joining in, because something else had hit him. </p><p>Nobody had recoiled in disgust, they were shocked at his honesty not at what he was being honest about.</p><p>A silly slip up had made him realise how very much he was accepted and as embarrassed as he was, he was also extremely grateful for his family. </p><p>Even though he was currently a bright shade of magenta, and he knew Jace would absolutely never let him forget this.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Comments, criticisms and prompts welcome ❤️</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. I wore it on purpose</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Just a little silly fluffy smutty moment where Magnus is wearing a particular tie to a meeting and Alec is a blushing mess as always ;)</p><p>Book universe!</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Alec felt his heart flutter as Magnus caught his eye during the shadowhunter-downworld alliance meeting, a smirk on his face sending a jolt right through him.</p><p>Alec normally didn’t attend, not now he was consul and had given the reins to Cristina, Maia and Lily. But occasionally he sat in to see what was happening, he knew the importance of being a leader who was actively involved. </p><p>It did mean however that he got to see Magnus in his business like demeanour, all bad ass taking no shit high warlock. It never failed to make him feel completely awed by the man. It was a reminder that this man who was so tender at home was also one of the most powerful people on the planet.</p><p>Plus Magnus absolutely loved to torture Alec when he knew he had to be professional. Mainly because he knew he would remain perfectly poised and Alec was hopeless at hiding the blush that always overcame him. </p><p>So when he had walked into the meeting and spotted his husband wearing the same tie he had used to tie Alec’s hands to the bed last night his brain had short circuited. Magnus had done that on purpose to make sure all Alec could think about during this meeting was Magnus. </p><p>He sat as far away from his husband as he could, last time Magnus had insisted on playing footsie with him. He was only thankful he didn’t actually have to speak, all he had to do was thank them for having him and then do his very best to not look entirely like a tomato. </p><p>He was failing miserably, every time he looked at his husband he was getting flash backs. Magnus tongue on his deflect rune, his nails dragging marks down his thighs as he took him into his mouth, the prostate vibrator he had used until Alec came so hard he saw stars. </p><p>He kept seeing his husbands face as he had finally untied him and made love to him, torturously slow. His skin like molten gold in the candle light, the way his eyes rolled back in his head, the barely there whisper of Alec’s name as he came. </p><p>Crap, Alec definitely had not been listening. He took a sip of coffee and tried to centre himself enough to take in what was being discussed. Something about wards, or wages, or..... something.</p><p>Maia shifted beside him, passed him a small note. This wasn’t unusual, sometimes they passed notes in meetings so as not to interrupt whoever was speaking.</p><p>He opened it to Maia’s perfect penmanship, and then struggling not to go even more red when he read her words.</p><p>“I’m one of your best friends I know when your eye fucking your husband ;););)”</p><p>He glanced at her and saw she was smirking slightly while nodded along to whatever Cristina Rosales was saying. </p><p>Alec picked up his pen and scribbled on the back of the note, he should really learn to be more professional.</p><p>“He’s wearing THE tie”.</p><p>She clearly pushed down a giggle when she read that, catching his eye before swinging back to face a rather irritated looking Faerie who was discussing space allocation in the shadowmarket.</p><p>Once the Fae had stopped speaking she cleared her throat and caught everyone’s attention. “Unfortunately that is all the time we have today, the inquisitor is due to discuss the cabinets thoughts on inter community punishments. I want to thank the consul for attending this meeting, his presence is always most welcome”. </p><p>Alec smiled around the table and as he stood so did everyone else, nodding thanks at him. He would never get used to being in this sort of position of power, and having so much respect, it was disconcerting for someone so used to hiding. </p><p>Also if they knew he had been just blushing like a school boy and passing notes about being tied up during sex, there might be a few raised eyebrows. </p><p>“Thank you for having me”, and with that he manoeuvred his way out, shaking a few hands and escaping to his office. He deliberately avoided Magnus lest he loose his composure completely. </p><p>It was almost 15 minutes before he heard the familiar knock on his office door, followed by his husband entering. Alec scowled at him from behind his desk, he knew remaining here was his best chance at remaining professional.</p><p>Magnus just smirked at him, “what’s wrong darling, did you not enjoy the meeting?”.</p><p>Alec sighed, trying to keep any mirth or arousal out of his voice, “you wore that tie on purpose, I’m the consul I can’t be blushing like a school boy”.</p><p>Magnus dropped the smirk, donning what Alec called his faux concern face, “I’m terribly sorry darling, I was in a hurry and this was the first tie I could grab”.</p><p>He took a step towards Alec, “I’ll take it off”, as he started removing the tie. </p><p>Before Alec could ever make a retort his husband was standing on front of him, dropping the tie on his desk. “I better open some buttons if I’m going for the casual look”, as he opened the top four buttons.</p><p> Alec was fully ready to retort and then he saw Magnus was wearing his new chain, the one that said Lightwood, it matched the Bane one he already had. Seeing the two together never failed to make Alec’s heart jump, a small reminder that they were married.</p><p>He traced it with his hand, forgetting entirely the little game they were having. Magnus smiled down at him, the mischievous sparkle replaced with a twin look of love, just for a second. </p><p>He took Alec’s hand and kissed it, before leaning in to his husband and whispering in his ear, “I wore it on purpose, what are you going to do about it?”.</p><p>Alec might have been 10 minutes late for his meeting with the inquisitor, and Maia and Lily may or may not have shot him very knowing glances when he came in.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Comments, criticisms and prompts welcome ❤️</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Jace</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>A little Jace POV of Malec 💞</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Jace pushed the sleeves of his dinner jacket up as he sat down with a thump, breathing heavily from the raucous dancing he had just partaken in.  </p>
<p>Clary had practically dragged him by the hair when some mundane song she loved came on. Jace couldn’t say no to her, especially on her mother’s wedding day, she was just so darn happy it was contagious. </p>
<p>As he caught his breathe he looked around the room at the guests, smiling at the various stages of intoxicated they all appeared to be in. His eyes came across his brother while he people watched and he felt happiness bloom in his chest.</p>
<p>Alec was sitting at a table with Magnus, he was talking animatedly and spilling his drink on the table. Magnus was laughing at whatever story his boyfriend was telling, clearly completely enthralled by him.</p>
<p>Jace loved Alec, probably more than anyone, and being parabatai meant Jace had been privy to Alec’s feelings for a long time. Over the years he had become used to being blocked by Alec, only occasionally feeling the pain, shame, and anger coming from his brother, as much as he tried to block it out. </p>
<p>Alec would sometimes allowed Jace to break through, but this trust always got overshadowed by his need to hide himself. To hide his feelings. Jace hadn’t realised at the time but he knew now that Alec was careful in case he let his secret slip out. </p>
<p>It hurt Jace, made him feel immeasurably guilty, that Alec had had to deal with this pain. That he ever felt less than. </p>
<p>He had believed he wasn’t good enough, when he was the best person that Jace knew. </p>
<p>Alec truly believed that feeling sad, feeling overwhelmed made him weak. Jace knew this was the opposite, he was the strongest person in Jace’s life. Even when he felt sad and alone he had gotten up and he had fought every day. </p>
<p>So smiled to himself as Alec finished whatever story he was telling and leaned over to kiss Magnus. When he pulled back he was smiling and his eyes spoke of nothing but love and happiness. </p>
<p>He was finally comfortable enough in his own skin that he would laugh and kiss his boyfriend in a room full of people. </p>
<p>Jace knew this was no mean feat. </p>
<p>He also knew that this wasn’t a miraculous change. Alec would face challenges, from those who looked at him with disgust, and from himself. Jace knew a lifetime of being expected to be perfect, and not living up to their parents high standards, had damaged Alec irrevocably. </p>
<p>But he also knew he would be ok, because he finally realised that he could be happy, and his happiness was important.  </p>
<p>Jace had never explicitly thanked Magnus for what he had done for his brother, but it was an unspoken known fact between them. They disagreed on most things but not when it came to Alec. They trusted each other to protect and love him, and for that Jace would be eternally grateful. </p>
<p>“What are you staring at?” Clary asked as she flopped down beside him, two fruity looking drinks in hand. </p>
<p>He stole one more glance at his brother, now listening while Magnus told him something, his eyes never leaving Magnus face. </p>
<p>Alec was going to be ok.</p>
<p>Jace smiled softly to himself, bringing his attention back to Clary, “nothing, just people watching”.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Gah, I’ve been really struggling with writing lately! I’m back in work (in a bar) and doing lots of overtime and late nights and I’m sort of struggling to get into a routine that includes time to write! </p>
<p>Anyway, I am still determined to get this finished someday haha thanks for reading everyone, as always comments, criticisms and suggestions  are always welcome!   </p>
<p>Hope everyone is well x</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Knowing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Magnus can’t sleep without Alec and reflects on his feelings towards his shadowhunter.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Magnus lay awake staring at the lights of Brooklyn through his bedroom window. It is an unseasonably cold night, and it’s impossible for some of the chill not to make its way in. </p><p>He hates to admit it, but he can’t sleep because Alec isn’t here. He had been on a mission that has gone on longer than they expected and had text Magnus to tell him he’d crash at the institute. </p><p>Magnus tries but sleep seems to want to evade him. He knows Alec is ok, but the empty bed, and the sting of loneliness, is beginning to suffocate Magnus. </p><p>Magnus has never been good at guarding his heart. He falls too deep, too quick, always too willing to offer up his still beating heart on a plate.</p><p>Camille eviscerated him. She knew he would give her everything and that she would give him nothing in return. The hardest part had been knowing that she had never truly loved him, not in the way he loved her.</p><p>After that he put up what he thought was an impenetrable shield, but how wrong he was. All it took was a pair of blue eyes attached to the most beguiling person Magnus had ever met. </p><p>The minute Alec Lightwood unceremoniously stumbled his way into Magnus’ life, he had been drawn to him. Magnus knew during that first fraught conversation, even with Jace and Clary present, that Alec was special. </p><p>Ok, Magnus didn’t realise just how special he would become to him. But maybe his heart knew. </p><p>Sometimes he thinks maybe he should have walked away, because he knows the pain that’s waiting for him on the other side.</p><p>But he couldn’t. </p><p>After he had saved Alec’s life and Alec had awkwardly asked him on a date, Magnus’ shell had cracked.</p><p>Even with the secretive nature at the beginning, every kiss, every touch from Alexander Lightwood broke off another piece of shell. He buried himself so deeply into Magnus’ heart that even then, he knew, when they would one day be separated Alec would take a piece of his heart with him. </p><p>Magnus would never be able to remain whole.</p><p>It seems dramatic even to Magnus’ own ears, but it’s the truth.</p><p>This truth has become a secret he keeps even from Alec. </p><p>They fought so much about Magnus’ secrets at the beginning. Magnus had been so mad at Alec for thinking he deserved to know everything about his life, about everyone that he had loved.</p><p>He never really considered it from Alec’s point of view. Never realised how insignificant Alec had felt under the weight of hundreds of other lovers. He believed fully he would be another in a long line and he would be replaced and forgotten.</p><p>Magnus should have told him the truth, but he still never has. </p><p>Alec is irreplaceable. Magnus never truly understood what it meant to have a true love until now. He had loved other people, and they had loved him back, but not like this. Not in a way that told him, in no unsure terms, that Alec Lightwood was his one. </p><p>He has told Alec he loves him more than he has ever loved anyone but he has never fully admitted to him, that after Alec there will never be another. Could never be another. </p><p>He probably would never truly be able to explain the feeling of simply knowing that Alec is his last great love. </p><p>So Alec knows Magnus worries for him, but he has never been fully honest about the extent. He has never told him that every day he feels the cold chill of fear that this might be the day he would lose him.</p><p>Every emergency, every mission, every time Alec so much as steps outside the loft to get a coffee, Magnus prepares himself for the blow he knows is inevitable. </p><p>That someday he won’t come home.</p><p>So this lonely empty bed feels like a preview to the life Magnus will have to endure after Alec is gone. </p><p>He tells himself he’s being over dramatic, he can survive a night without him.</p><p>Then, as if he magicked him up, he hears the front door click and his heart immediately quietens. </p><p>He can hear the sound of Alec taking off his boots, and hanging up his jacket. The inevitable low curse as he walks into the phone table, Magnus really needs to move that. </p><p>Magnus stays still as he tiptoes into their bathroom to brush his teeth. Then less than two minutes later he’s undressed and wriggling his way under the covers. </p><p>Magnus stays still as Alec snuggles in against him, pressing himself as close as he can get. </p><p>The night is still and Magnus almost thinks he’s asleep. Until he murmurs a “I couldn’t sleep without you” into the crook of Magnus neck. </p><p>Magnus felt his heart bursting with that sudden rush of love. Alec never said anything he didn’t mean, he never made false declarations. He wouldn’t even think about what he just said, would never be embarrassed to admit it. </p><p>Magnus snuggled deeper into his embrace, relishing in every part of Alec pressed against him. His soft snuffling told Magnus he had fallen asleep. </p><p>So Magnus allowed himself to relax. The feeling of fear at the back of Magnus’ mind would never go away, he knew that. But he allowed himself to appreciate this moment, he’s home, he’s safe, today was a win.</p><p>“Me neither” he whispered back into the quiet room, and finally sleep began to take him.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hope everyone is well!!</p><p>This K chapter totally threw me, and I 100% gave up and stuck in a line so I could use the title 😂😬 but I had this in my drafts and actually really like it! </p><p>Anyway thanks for reading, leaving kudos and commenting it really does mean the world! I love this community ❤️</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Lullaby</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Alec is sick and all he wants is Magnus!</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Alec Lightwood was rarely sick, injured yes, sick no. He hated it, hated feeling weak without what he considered a good cause. He was sick now, a flu maybe, or a bug, he didn’t know, all he knew was that he had woken up and had been in the bathroom ever since.</p>
<p>He threw up every morsel of dinner before moving on to the very lining of his stomach. He felt abnormally weak, and he was fairly certain he had a fever. He rested his head against the cool tile of the bathroom floor, willing his roiling stomach to ease so he could sleep. </p>
<p>It was no use every time he almost drifted off his stomach screamed at him in protest. He was starting to feel needy, what he believed was an unfortunate bi product of being coddled as a child. </p>
<p>As tough as Maryse and a Robert were, they always worried when their children were sick. They were always there to sing a lullaby, hold a cold compress to a fever hot forehead and carry you back to bed after falling asleep on the bathroom floor. </p>
<p>But they weren’t here, because Alec was a grown up now he reminded himself, that lived with his boyfriend. His boyfriend who was also not here, because he was at a warlock conference in Los Angeles. </p>
<p>Alec felt miserable, he wanted to call Magnus, but he would be asleep, and it wasn’t fair. As another wave hit him he started to cry, he was so tired and he didn’t know how much more he could take. </p>
<p>Eventually he picked up his phone with a trembling hand when he had flushed the toilet and sat back against the bath. Maybe he would just text him and see if he was awake. So he did, just a quick, are you up message, and then he lay back down on the bathroom floor. </p>
<p>He was drifting when the sound of his phone startled him awake, it was vibrating across the floor, Magnus was calling him. He answered the phone without even speaking, afraid too sudden a movement would wake his stomach. </p>
<p>“Darling, I got your text, are you ok?” The sound of Magnus voice made him cry again, he wanted so badly to be held. He fully planned on at least attempting to be strong but as he opened his mouth to say he was ok his stomach revolted.</p>
<p>He dropped the phone and flung himself at the toilet, banging his knee in the process and making, he was sure, the most disgusting noises Magnus had ever heard. </p>
<p>His head spun as he gripped on willing himself not to also faint, he was so caught up he must not have heard the sound of a portal opening. Suddenly there was a hand on his back, he didn’t even need to turn to know it was Magnus.</p>
<p>He didn’t even wipe his mouth before he turned and fell into his arms, almost sobbing in relief at having him there. Magnus quietened him with whispered words, gently rubbing his back and wiping his face with a blissfully cool cloth. </p>
<p>He couldn’t even bring himself to feel embarrassed, all the fight went out of him as soon as Magnus was there. He vaguely felt himself being made drink something, and being carried to bed. </p>
<p>He suddenly felt comfortable, and clung onto the solid warmth beside him, knowing without doubt he would be looked after. He drifted in and out of sleep knowing that Magnus was there to hold him, and after what felt like weeks he opened his eyes properly. The room was bathed in muted light, it must have been still early morning.</p>
<p>Alec shifted and Magnus ran his fingers through his hair, shushing him and telling him to go back to sleep. Alec wanted to question why he was still awake, but he knew deep down that Magnus wouldn’t sleep until he knew Alec was ok. </p>
<p>He wanted to thank him, to tell him how grateful he was, how much he loved him but sleep was started to pull him back under. Magnus knew Alec was fighting sleep, he always knew, so he cuddled him tighter and started to sing.</p>
<p>It was a lullaby that his mother had sang to him, it was in Indonesian and even though Alec didn’t understand the words he could feel the sentiment. Love. Magnus’ soft voice washed over him and he managed a gentle squeeze of his hand before sleep took him.</p>
<p>The sounds of the lullaby following him into his dreams.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Magnus</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>After five years together Magnus was able to gather whole conversations or hear a whole story simply by the way Alec said his name. </p><p>He had heard, he thinks, every possible way Alexander could say that one word.</p><p>Magnus could tell when Alec was mad at him, and exactly how mad. The jokey exasperated mad, the serious but not serious enough to fight mad and the full blown anger mad. </p><p>Magnus could gauge how to continue any heated conversation by how Alec said his name, down to how drawn out the s was. The sharper the word the angrier he was, a drawn out s meant he wasn’t really that mad.</p><p>He knew exactly how much trouble Alec was in by the way he spoke his name down the phone. Magnus could sense just by that if Alec was panicked, if he was hurt and how quickly Magnus needed to get to his side.</p><p>He had heard his name cried out from an infirmary bed and knew whether he needed to heal or whether he just needed to hold his hand. </p><p>When Alec came home from a long day he could tell by the exact tremble in his voice as he called out to Magnus whether he needed a hug, or a drink.</p><p>He knew when Alec was about to cry, he’d only heard it a few times, but he knew. </p><p>He also knew when Alec was truly happy, when he could feel the love his husband had for him down to his very bones by the way he whispered his name. When he seemed truly in awe of Magnus. </p><p>Magnus could tell when Alec wanted to sneak off to a quiet corner, or room, by the way his voice dropped an octave. But only on his name. Indecipherable to others but one of Magnus’ favourite sounds.</p><p>Magnus was fairly proud of the fact he could tell to the second when Alec was about to cum, just by the way his voice trembles ever so slightly on Magnus name. </p><p>He knew when Alec was sick, when he was sad, when he was frustrated or when he found something Magnus said extremely funny. </p><p>He heard the way Alec’s voice gained another layer of something when he mentioned Magnus to someone. </p><p>He sometimes wondered if Alec had the same talent, if he could read Magnus the same way, and he hoped so. He hoped Alec never wondered how Magnus felt, because he never did anymore, he always knew exactly where he stood. </p><p>Always knew that even when Alec said his name in anger, or frustration, or hurt, it was always layered with love. </p><p>He thought even 50 years from now his heart would still flutter at every utterance of his name from Alec’s lips, like a promise that Alec could always see him, for better and for worse.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you so much for sticking with this, and for all the kudos and comments, every one means so much! Hope everyone is keeping well x</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Newlyweds</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>A brief look at Magnus and Alec’s wedding night, slightly smutty, very fluffy!</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Eek I have fallen way behind on writing as I have started my masters! I’m not certain what this is exactly but it came to me and I figured I’d include it, it’s the first time I’ve felt any inspiration in a while!! Hope you enjoy, comments as always are welcome 💜💜</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Alec gripped the headboard as lowered himself onto Magnus, his body shaking with the effort of going slow. He was burning with desire, his every nerve alight with the need for Magnus. It was overwhelming.</p><p>He felt Magnus’ breath on his chest, his finger tips on his thighs, the scent of him in the air. He was surrounded by Magnus as he was filled inch by inch, his body welcoming him in every possible way.</p><p>Everything seemed to go quiet when he was fully seated, until all he could hear was the sound of his own heart beating Magnus’ name in his ears.</p><p>He leaned forward to press his forehead against his husbands, meeting him for a kiss. Neither of them moved bar their lips for minutes, there was no need for urgency, not tonight. Not on their wedding night.</p><p>The only movement was Magnus fingers trailing up Alec’s thighs to grip his hips, steadying him before he began to move. Alec couldn’t help but feel gratitude for how Magnus was always there to make sure he didn’t fall. </p><p>He could feel the cold metal of his wedding ring against his hip, a reminder of the day they just had. The thrill of being married, of being whole, floated through Alec’s body.</p><p>He moved back to look into Magnus’ eyes as he started to move, a slow pace to start, so he could appreciate the feel of every drag. His body sang with the pleasure, somehow made more excruciatingly beautiful by the promise they had just made to one another.</p><p>There was no need for words, no need for affirmations of love, not now, their bodies could do the talking for them. Alec’s body was singing with bliss, every movement bringing him closer and closer to the edge.</p><p>Another fall Magnus would be there for, not to catch him, but to fall with him. Alec knew Magnus would always be there to ensure he never had to face that cliff edge alone.</p><p>The edge came quicker than he wanted, but he brought his husband with him, their moans mingling together in a symphony. Their bodies collapsing together in a perfect mess of limbs.</p><p>Alec never wanted to move, he wanted to be frozen in time in this moment, never to be parted from this man. His husband. </p><p>“Your husband”, his heart sang to him .</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Ok</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Alec opens up to Magnus about his feelings on becoming immortal, and on times he struggled.</p>
<p>Some mention of past self harm and suicidal thoughts, but with a hopeful ending!</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Alec had been lying to Magnus for as long as he could remember. Sometimes he told him he was fine, told him he was just tired, and then he waited until Magnus was out to cry.</p>
<p>Alec had spent the first years of his life happy, expectations were high but he felt he could reach them. As he became a teenager and the suffocating weight of his own secrets had begun to bury him the happiness had seeped away until there was only a drop left. </p>
<p>He was happier now, he didn’t feel entirely scraped out from the inside. But it hurts sometimes and while he has become a master of disguise his treacherous thoughts still tear at him from the inside. </p>
<p>He had decided it was time to be truthful. The decision had come to him after Catarina had brought some information. The spiral labyrinth had, after years of study, figured out a way to make a person immortal. It was a gruelling process, one not taken lightly, and she had told him so he knew he had a choice.</p>
<p>Magnus had tried not to react but Alec had seen the warring emotions flutter across his face, almost indecipherable. But Alec knew him too well. He saw the hope, replaced immediately by fear and disappointment before being replaced with nonchalance.</p>
<p>Alec had simply nodded and thanked her, and Catarina, always able to read a room, had excused herself with a quick hug for them both.</p>
<p>They had been left in silence. </p>
<p>Magnus had gone to make tea, to delay the conversation, and Alec had decided it was time to be open with him. </p>
<p>So here they were, sitting on the balcony, the sounds of Brooklyn below them and the clear night all around them.</p>
<p>Alec, sensing Magnus was waiting for him to speak, sighed and faced his boyfriend, mentally preparing himself.</p>
<p>“Magnus, I’ve been lying to you”. Magnus looked momentarily shocked, then wary, this wasn’t what he was expecting. “I’ve been lying to you about my reasons for not wanting to be immortal”.</p>
<p>Alec took his boyfriends hands, relishing in the grounding feeling this simply act of intimacy brought him. </p>
<p>“I’m just going to be honest, I am afraid of losing people, but that’s a possibility anyway, I could lose everyone I love tomorrow”. He breathed deep, “Magnus, I love you and you make me so happy, but sometimes I just feel so sad for no reason”.</p>
<p>Magnus tightened his grip, but didn’t interrupt him.</p>
<p>“It was worse when I was a teenager, before I met you, I felt so inadequate, so much like a failure. I was suffocating all the time. I didn’t want to be myself”. </p>
<p>He closed his eyes for the next part, not wanting to see Magnus face when he admitted what he saw as his greatest sin. </p>
<p>“I hurt myself. It started off just training for too long, to purposely not getting small wounds healed, to eventually cutting myself”. </p>
<p>Magnus didn’t speak, but continued to hold his hands, knowing Alec had to get everything out first.</p>
<p>“I hated myself, and I wanted to end the pain, I never could go through with it but I thought about it”. He hesitated but Magnus began rubbing his thumb in calming circles, silently telling Alec he was listening. “I thought about killing myself”.</p>
<p>There is was, it was out there, and Alec had never felt more vulnerable, more exposed. </p>
<p>“I’ve never told anyone. I think that maybe Isabelle and Jace knew in a way but they never said anything, and I never told them”.</p>
<p>He opened his eyes, and Magnus was looking at him the way he did when Alec was hurt. A mix of love and worry, and an undercurrent of grief, grief for the thought of losing him.</p>
<p>Magnus cleared his throat, something he usually did to bide time to think of something to say. Alec thought to himself how happy he was that he knew him so well, it warmed him, even with everything.</p>
<p>“Alexander, darling, thank you for telling me. Do you still feel this way? If you do, it’s ok, you’re allowed to not be ok”. </p>
<p>Alec shook his head. “I still feel bad, sometimes, like I’m not good enough, like I’m a failure. But I don’t want to die, not any more”.</p>
<p>“The reason I never wanted to be immortal was because I didn’t think I could bear having to feel like this forever”. </p>
<p>Magnus nodded, his grip never wavering, Alec could feel his rings digging into his fingers. But he wanted it, the feeling kept him grounded.</p>
<p>“I’ve come to a realisation though”. Magnus snapped his eyes back to Alec’s face as his boyfriend continued. “I’ve realised that life will never be easy, but it would give me the chance to do so much good”. </p>
<p>“It would give me the chance to leave behind the whispers and glares of the past and help to bring a better future for people like me”.</p>
<p>Alec moved towards Magnus resting his forward against his chest. </p>
<p>“It would give me eternity to be with you. I’m scared of losing the others, I’m scared of my own mind sometimes, but over everything I’m more scared of losing you. A lifetime isn’t enough”.</p>
<p>Magnus had stopped breathing. </p>
<p>He spoke, a whisper so low it was almost lost to to the breeze. </p>
<p>“Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”</p>
<p>Alec nodded against him, “I’m saying, I’m finally ready to be open to the possibility of forever. But I wanted you to know that I’m broken, and I don’t want you to feel obliged to deal with that forever, or even for now”.</p>
<p>Magnus huffed out a breathe and moved his hands to Alec’s face, pushing his back far enough to look into his eyes.</p>
<p>“Alexander Gideon Lightwood, I love every part of you. You think these struggles make you weak but they don’t, they make you the strongest person I know. To get up every day and shoulder the burdens you do while feeling like that, it takes a strength very few possess”. </p>
<p>Magnus paused, and Alec could see the tears in his eyes, could feel his own beginning to spring up.</p>
<p>“If you choose this, I cannot promise things will be perfect, but I can promise you that I will fight for you and love you with every fibre of my being”. </p>
<p>Alec’s heart thumped, he had been afraid to tell Magnus for so long. He had never really been sure why, but years of believing yourself to be broken really does a number on you. </p>
<p>It wasn’t a fix, he knew he wouldn’t suddenly wake up tomorrow and everything would be perfect. But still it felt as though a weight had been lifted. </p>
<p>He would have to think about this decision, but deep down he knew he had already made it. Life is never easy, but he felt optimism, that small bloom of it that had started the day he met Magnus which continued to grow. </p>
<p>He held onto the strength Magnus was sure he possessed, and he started to allow himself to think about the good things immortality could bring. </p>
<p>Change, healing and time, time to love Magnus and time to learn to love himself. </p>
<p>He finally believed he would be ok.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Ok, hi everyone! It’s been a long minute! I wasn’t well, and have been doing my masters and working so I didn’t have much time for this! But I promised myself I would get this finished this year so here we go! </p>
<p>Not sure about this chapter but it’s been languishing in my drafts and I quite like it! </p>
<p>I hope everyone is doing ok! There’s so much going on, but I love coming to here and reading everyone’s stories and comments! Xx</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Peace</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Magnus realises the depth of Alec’s trust in him 💖</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Magnus shifted slightly, balancing his book in one hand as he leaned over to take a sip of tea with the other. No mean feat while you have 230 pounds of shadowhunter half lying on top of you. </p><p>Magnus smiled to himself and brushed a stray lock of hair away from Alec’s face. He didn’t mind, in fact he loved moments like this, where his boyfriend craved physical contact, even in his sleep.</p><p>Magnus had been injured, quite seriously, on a mission and while he was fine now, Alec had been badly shaken up. He had stayed awake all night while Magnus slept and only when he knew he was ok did he allow himself to drift off. </p><p>Magnus was just losing himself in his reading again when he heard the door to his bedroom creek open. Jace popped his head around, holding up a small vial of potion which Magnus presumed Catarina had sent over. </p><p>Jace smiled as he entered, nodding towards his brother “he didn’t wake up”. </p><p>Magnus frowned slightly, reaching out for the potion, “he had a rough night, he’s exhausted”. Jace nodded, “I know, it’s just we are trained to always wake up at the slightest sound or intrusion”.</p><p>“We are taught from a young age that we have to be ready to fight at all times, sleeping too heavily could allow an enemy to sneak up on you. It can mean death”. </p><p>Magnus felt the familiar surge of hatred for the clave at that statement. He knew obviously it was true, but it seemed so bitterly unfair again that this is the life they had to lead. Not even allowed to truly rest. </p><p>Jace smirked at Magnus, shaking his head slightly, “I know that look, it’s your screw the clave for our shitty lives look”.</p><p>Magnus opened his mouth to argue, but knew there was no point as Jace raised an eyebrow at him.</p><p>“I’m not saying this as a bad thing Magnus, the thing is we’ve been talking and he hasn’t even shifted”.</p><p>He sighed, carrying a face Magnus had seen Alec make so many times as he worried for his siblings. A rare moment when Magnus was reminded that despite the bravado, Jace had a truly loving heart. </p><p>Magnus moved his hand to grip Alec’s arm, an almost unconscious gesture. </p><p>“Alec worries for us constantly, he worries for the institute, he worries about what people think. He’s always been like that. This may not seem a big deal but I promise you it is”. </p><p>“This means that when he’s here, with you, he knows he’s safe”. </p><p>Magnus tightened the grip he had on Alec’s arm ever so slightly. </p><p>Jace sighed and took the empty potion from Magnus, placing his hand on his shoulder. “I don’t really say this Magnus, but you have given him something so much more than love. You’ve given him something he has never had before, peace”.</p><p>With a gentle squeeze Jace made his way out, not waiting for Magnus to reply as he clicked the door softly behind him.</p><p>Magnus sat in a slightly stunned silence, the only sound the soft snuffling of his boyfriend,  still blissfully under sleeps blanket. </p><p>He supposed he had never thought of that, had never really noticed how Alec had stopped waking every time Magnus moved or went to the bathroom. </p><p>How he would always seem so much more exhausted when he slept at the institute, clearly waking up whenever an unexpected noise interrupted him.</p><p>Magnus realised with an almost startling clarity, it wasn’t just that he was more comfortable here, it was that he trusted Magnus to keep him safe. He trusted him with his life on a level far deeper than Magnus had ever even considered. </p><p>Magnus held him tighter, hoping that this feeling of safety would never leave Alec, that he would always believe so wholeheartedly in Magnus’ ability to protect him. </p><p>Magnus thanked the universe that with everything Alec had given him, Magnus was able to give him, in Jace’s words, peace.</p>
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